Monday, September 14, 2009

Day 5 - On Struggle & Solitude

No journey is difficult. Is living difficult? Because if it is difficult, then the result is certain---which is go to the highest mountain and jump off. If you can't handle living, there are no drugs in the world that are going to cure you. If you're feeling depressed, then get undepressed.

Our struggles are not outside of us, they are in us. Our struggle with our spouses, jobs, kids, they are all within us. And it's not that you choose that you want to be one thing or the other--it's already been decided for you.

Pessimistic view, pessimistic thought, pessimistic outcome.

If you can't cheer yourself up, who will? If you don't love yourself, who will? If you don't understand yourself, who will?

Solitude on this cycling journey, being alone, being on a mountain, and moving forward, I don't see cars, trucks, anything. I realize how alone one is.

Alone is not lonely. Alone is just you with yourself.

When you learn--and it can only be for a moment--when you learn that you are vulnerable, that you are not in control, you will be able to see the images of you.

One of the things that I have seen are these trucks. Not one, but many trucks, pass by. I have two feet pedaling, and I realize that I am not in charge. If it ends for me there, it ends for me there.

And so, in whose hands am I? In those of the men and women who drive these trucks and cars? Because clearly I am not in control.

This is the solitude that I'm talking about.

You can't live remembering everything, or putting things into practice. It's just not the way life is lived. The moment it enters your mind, it's already recorded. Why do you want to live life practicing something you already know? Why not live what you don't know? Or what's unknown? Let yourself go, live, be free of fear.

And move closer to yourself--to knowing me, the ego.

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